SEATTLE – With our nation at war, many people want to show support for soldiers and their families.

They're often tempted to give when a solicitor calls for a donation. While there are many worthy organizations, a KING 5 investigation finds a surprising number of veterans charities come up short.

The KING 5 Investigators examined records of registered charities in this state - those with permission to raise money, presumably to support veteran's causes. We found they can raise money, pay themselves and give no money to veterans.

For 67-year-old Judy, the phone solicitors started calling during the lonely months after her husband's death.

"I suspect they probably read the obituaries," she said.

Judy spent hours on the phone with callers from The American Veterans Relief Foundation and other charities. The callers asked for help - money - that was desperately needed for suffering vets and their families. Judy, who has Alzheimer's, doesn't remember how much money she gave.

"I don't really remember, it sounded so sad," she said. "And I was just feeling so lonesome cause it was right after Ross passed. I guess I just wrote checks."

Judy's checks went to some of the worst veterans charities in Washington, according to a KING 5 Investigators analysis of registered charities.

Charity watchdogs urge donors to avoid organizations that spend 35 percent or more of the money they raise on administrative costs, like telemarketing. We found that half the registered veterans charities in Washington state miss the mark, giving small percentages to vets while spending big on salaries and professional fundraising.

We tracked down Robert Friend, Junior. He refused repeated interview requests about his multi-million dollar charity to which Judy donated, and three others he runs from a Gig Harbor office.

So we had the IRS send us his application for tax-exempt status for one of them, The American Veterans Coalition. Friend told the IRS it would give half of its resources to homeless and disabled vets.

But the K5 Investigators' review of tax forms shows he's given only a tiny percentage each year. In 2003 the group didn't give a single dollar to any veteran.

INGALLS: "Mr Friend, you're not giving any money to veterans, sir. That's why we're here. These veterans aren't getting any money are they?"

FRIEND: "I'm sorry we have no comment."

On the surface, Friend's 2003 tax form shows he gave nearly 5 percent, or $18,000, to the cause. But a closer look shows that he actually rolled that money into more fundraising and expenses.

A little known part of the law allows charities to claim "joint costs." They can say that their fundraising has a dual purpose of raising money and spreading an educational message about the cause they claim to represent.

Friend could legally argue that his fundraising letters and calls raise awareness of homeless vets, and that is his contribution to the cause.

Secretary of State Sam Reed, whose office registers charities, reviewed Friend's tax records at our request.

"Well, frankly I'm appalled," he said.

But he can't revoke their registration.

Reed says many courts have ruled that states can't cap the amount of money charities keep for themselves.

INGALLS: "This is just unfair, right?"

REED: "Yes. As long as they're truthful, honest straightforward with what they're doing, there's nothing the State of Washington can do about them."

Mitch Gold built a $70 million charity empire in California. The Orange County Register crowned him the "king of California telemarketing," before he was sent to federal prison for fraud.

Robert Friend Jr. and his wife Shao Mei Wang were Gold's business partners -- who may have learned from his mistakes. Their tax forms clearly show they've paid themselves nearly $400, 000 over three years.

Telemarketers and professional fundraisers swallowed most of the $8 million their charities have raised. Only 1 percent went to veterans and other causes.

Judy's relatives hired an accountant to tally her donations to Friend's charities and others linked to former Mitch Gold associates. So far she's uncovered a loss of nearly $20,000 and counting.

'"I had never really felt stupid - and I felt as stupid as I could be," Judy said. "I don't know what more I can say."